flying through clouds of uncertainty on wings of existential dread
Oh, theatre deaths. I ended up skipping A&C the other night because it was raining, the people who were meeting me to see it cancelled, and I’ve seen it PLENTY during tech week, so I missed out on some completely bloodless death scenes.
Over the years, I’ve dealt with a lot of theatre deaths — red ribbons, painted blood, buckets of fake blood, trick knives, the Elizabethan red scarf solution, and, in one memorable Caesar, filling rubber grapes with blood so that they could be palmed by the actors and then squished like tiny horrible enema bulbs — awesome effect, improved when their body mics picked up the squishing sound and it really sounded like they were squelching through Caesar’s organs. Yum. Then there was an ‘Of Mice and Men’ in undergrad, when Lenny nearly drowned because nobody thought about how much water his cotton body padding would wick up when he fell (theoretically dead) into the pool, or how heavy that would make him. Also, we learned that, when you borrow a dog to play the elderly dog in that show, you should really try not to borrow an actual elderly dog. Worst. Moment. Ever. Well, the worst until later, when we realized the show hadn’t closed yet and we still needed to find someone else to lend us a (younger) dog. And then explain why we needed a new dog halfway through the run. Actually, could we just have a moment of silence for the first dog please? I’m sad now.
Anyway, theatre deaths. Anyone else have a good story?
Oh, also, I have a poll running, and I probably won’t call it final till next Sunday. Just remember, if you’re not a Potter fan (you bad person, you), Ravenclaw=brainy, Hufflepuff=reliable, Gryffindor=brave, and Slytherin=
asshole ambitious. Screw you, Snape! I still don’t forgive! Anyway, vote! This is your one and only chance to be the Sorting Hat for someone you may or may not actually know or care about. Wooo!