Weekly thingy and fairytales.
So I’m late on the weekly thingy because I’m off work for 3 weeks now and so time has lost all meaning, but behold, a princess thing!
And that works out well, because I aw Swan Lake last night and, as usual, had thoughts.
Look, I’ve probably seen Swan Lake live at least 6 or 8 times in my life; I’ve seen this particular production twice now. I recently found the Matthew Bourne homoerotic scary swan fest on Youtube and rewatched it twice in a row. I love me some Swan Lake, but surely we all accept that there is a certain level of absurdity inherent in this thing?
TLDR: Nara ruins Swan Lake.
Siegfried & pals: Hunting is fun! Hunt hunt hunt, fun fun fun!
Siegfried’s Mom: Hey son, you need to get married. Like, now. Here’s four girls, pick one.
Siegfried: Mooooooom, I don’t want to get married I’m not ready noooooo!
Ten minutes later:
Siegfried: Hello, mysterious forest lady! I love you forever!
Who’s that guy? Is that your scary goth dad?
HOLY SHIT HE TURNED YOU INTO A SWAN WHAT IS UP WITH YOUR FAMILY.
I still love you, swan.
Odette: Oh good, here are 24 of my swan friends. We’re kind of a package deal.
Siegfried: Don’t shoot, I’m in love with that swan!
Siegfried’s BFF Benno: Siegfried, dude. That’s kinky AF. Wait, is he seriously dancing with a giant fucking bird? So, yeah, you do . . . that, and we’ll just meet you back home.
Later that night:
Siegfried: Moooooom, look, I totally am ready to get married now, but not to one of those girls.
Siegfried’s Mom: Those are literally the only girls. Our kingdom has a real shortage of girls (and a remarkable overabundance of swans, but that’s neither here nor there).
Siegfried: No, look, here’s the girl I love! That weird hunched shape in the sparkly black hooded cloak. Can I introduce you to her scary goth dad?
Odile: Wheeeee look at me I’m totally that forest girl you love pay no attention to how weird I’m being. Look, spins!
Siegfried: I love you forever spinny swan girl and I promise I will never love anybody else no matter what.
Odette: For fuck’s sake, did you not even notice that she’s a black fucking swan? Are you fucking blind that is not me you fucking asshole.
Siegfried: What, I don’t see colour.
Welp, too late now, time to drown romantically together and then hope something works out with that whole Von Rothbart situation without us.
Swan maidens: Damn they were dramatic. Let’s go attack some small children, being swans is fun.
Places to buy stuff!
- TEEPUBLIC: mostly t-shirts, a few other products. Watch for sales, when shirts drop from $20 to $14!
- REDBUBBLE: Just, I don’t know, a ton of different stuff. T-shirts are more expensive than Teepublic, but there are a lot more options.
- AMAZON: 2 colouring books, and now, a nearly-complete cartoon collection! (Till I draw more.)
- ETSY: beaded jewelry, bags of creepy tiny dolls, and The Neurotic Owl Tarot
Did I miss something? I think that’s everything.
What’s making me happy this week:
- Did you hear that thing about off work for three weeks? VA.CA.TION. Yessssss.
- I am most of the way through making myself a purse, and I could certainly have bought a pretty nice purse cheaper but this one will be exactly what I want it to be and also it’s fun. Pictures soon, but if you’re in a purse-making mood, I’ve extremely happy with The Crafty Nomad’s messenger bag instructions.